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<<audio alleyMusic loop play>>
You enter into the dark, garbage strewn alley and sniff-sniff, the putrid smell of urine and rot floods your nostrils and memories of Bourbon Street in August fills your brain.
The alley appears to go further back, past the overflowing dumpster and the trash that surrounds it.
[[Plug your nose and continue on.|Deeper Alley]]
[[Get the heck outta here.|Central Main Street]] <<set $deepAlleyCount to $deepAlleyCount + 1>>
As you round the dumpster and head into a small alcove the nauseating smell intensifies and you realize, compared to this, the dumpster is inviting.
<<if $mcginty is false>>
Among the mounds of trash, you think you see a [[Clue]]
<<else>>
Now that McGinty is gone you look around the alcove and behind some boxes you discover a [[wooden door|French Bistro]].
<<set $randomNum to random(1,3)>>
<<if $randomNum is 1>>
Under a pile of old Chinese take out boxes, you see the soft glow of eyes <img src="eyes1.png" style="margin-left: 10px; margin-right: 10px;" width=100 hieght=35> peering out of the dumpster.
<</if>>
<</if>>
[[Go back now before the smell permeates your being|Dark Alley]]
You start reaching for the clue and from under one of the mounds of trash a menacing brut jumps up and starts for you...
[[Run Away!|Deeper Alley]]
[[Kick the menacing brut in the groin.|Groin]]
[[Curl up like a possum.]]
<<set $pepStick to false>>
<<set $mcginty to true>>
You rear back and deliver the hardest kick you can possibly imagine! Right in pills!
<<timed 2s t8n>><span class="bigText">CLANG!</span>
<<next>>Pain rockets up your leg and through your entire body and you drop your giant pepperoni stick.
<<next>>“HAHAHA” says the menacing brut. “The name’s McGinty. You Jerk.”
<<next>>McGinty grabs your giant pepperoni stick and dives into the dumpster. You reach for him as he burrows his way under the muck and trash but he is gone.
<<next>>[[Look Around|Deeper Alley]]
<</timed>>
You heave the garlic bomb into the middle of the crowd and send everybody running for fresh air.
[[You quickly slip inside|In Concert]]The menacing brut scoops you up and says:
"Just what I always wanted. My own little possum. I will love him, squeeze him, and call him George."
You spend the rest of your life being squeezed and called George. The world is plunged into a pineapple pizza darkness... Why didn't you just kick the brut in the groin?
[[Go back and try again|Clue]] <<cacheaudio "alleyMusic" "http://patricknormile.com/pages/pizzaSlice/POL-the-foyer-short.wav">>
Background music from PlayOnLoop.com
<<set $mcginty to false>>
<<set $pepStick to true>>
<<set $deepAlleyCount to 0>>
<<set $visitedFieldOnce to false>>
You feel groggy, in a stupor. You wonder to yourself, hat happened last night? I must have really tied one on.
What's going on? You start to come to.
Wake up! Wake up!
Someone stole the pizza! You've got to get it back.
What?... Why?... Oooh, this heartburn is killing me.
It's not just a pizza, it's the "One Pizza". If it falls into the wrong hands, the evil pizzaioli will be set loose on the world. They’ll serve nothing but pineapple pizza for the rest of eternity. You’ve got to get the One Pizza back!
Pineapple! That won’t stand! I’ll do it! I’ll get the One Pizza back and save... save... humanity or something.
Excellent. Here are a few items to help you: a pizza pan shield, a garlic bomb, and a giant pepperoni stick.
[[Let's go|Lower Main Street]] Garlic bomb
Have McGinty throw hero back to main street
Curl up
Have game end?
figure out links I wnat a link to advance the story on the same page
Re-write text for proper dialogThe One Pizza to Rule Them AllCreated by:
Patrick Normile
Images by:
Samantha Lucia Normile
Music by:
Background music from PlayOnLoop.com
Icons by:
Author: PixelMixer, pixel-mixer.comSave the pizza loving world!<<audio alleyMusic stop>>
You enter through the wooden door into a room filled with restaurant supplies and realize you are in the storeroom of the French Bistro.
You see a [[computer|Computer]].
You see a [[hat]].
You see a [[large tank]].
<<if hasVisited("hat", "large tank","Computer")>>
You hear someone coming. [[Get out Now!|Deeper Alley]]
<</if>>Hey! This looks just like my missing hat. Except for this red stain on it.
It can't be yours, [[put it back|French Bistro]].Snails! Probably somebody's lunch.
[[Look away|French Bistro]]<table style="width:100%"><tr><td>You see people on the street just trying to find a plan... just looking for the land...
You also see Lucy and Ramona roller-skating around in front of [[The 13 Coins|13 Coins]] restaurant.
You can also hear music coming out of the [[concert hall|Concert Hall]]. The billboard reads:
Tonight Only
The Gap Band
<<if !hasVisited("Suspicious Dialog")>>
[[Talk to Lucy and Ramona|LR Dialog]]
<</if>>
[[Continue up the street|Central Main Street]]
</td>
<td><img src="mainsign.png" width=300 height=500></td>
</tr>
</table>
[[Back down the street|Central Main Street]]
On your left you see an entrance to a [[French Bistro|French Bistro Front]]
[[Head to the field|Field]]
[[Continue up the street|Rocky Precipice]]<<audio alleyMusic stop>>
<table style="width:100%">
<tr><td><<if hasVisited("French Bistro Front")>>
A truck starts up and pulls away revealing a [[Dark Alley]].
<<else>>
You see a delivery truck parked blocking the sidewalk and an entrance to an alley.
<</if>>
[[Go down the street|Lower Main Street]]
[[Head to the playground|Playground]]
[[Go up the street|Upper Main Street]]
</td><td><img src="mainst0.png" width=400 height=300></td>
</tr>
</table>
<<if !hasVisited("Computer On")>>
The sign on the door says "Tonight's show is sold out".
<<else>>
The music is thumping from behind the doors. The bouncers are keeping a growing crowd of would-be concert goers away front the door. It's a sold-out show. Without a ticket there is no way you will get inside.
Maybe a distraction will work.
Use the [[garlic bomb|Garlic Bomb]].
<</if>>
[[Back to the street|Lower Main Street]] <<if !hasVisited("In Concert")>>13 Coins is closed.
[[Back to the street|Lower Main Street]]
<<else>>
You enter the lobby and look for a place to sit down. There are so many people waiting that there is no place to sit. You are exhausted, but you notice your cousin sitting on the couch so you decide you will sit on his lap.
Cousin: “Hey, sit on his lap.”
You cousin points to a guy with dyed red hair.
[[Sit on red haired guy’s lap|sit]]
[[Give up the idea and hit the streets again|Fortune Cookie]]
<</if>>
<table style="width:100%"> <tr> <td><<if hasVisited("Second Taunt")>>
You start toward the French bistro again...
From the roof top comes a cow catapulting right towards you.
[[Run Away!|Upper Main Street]]
<<else>>
You start to enter a quaint little French bistro when a man stops you and, with a strong French accent, says...
"AH! You again, you silly pizza man!"
You think... Me again? Funny, I don't remember ever meeting this guy.
"Your mother was a Hamster and you father smelt of elderberry!!!!"
[[Ok, I'm outa here|Upper Main Street]]
[[Is there someone else up there we can talk to?|Second Taunt]]
<</if>></td>
<td><img src="lebistro0.png" width=400 height=300></td>
</tr>
</table> <table style="width:100%">
<tr>
<td>
[[Back to the street|Central Main Street]]
[[Head to the field|Field]]
</td>
<td><img src="hoop.png" width=500 hieght=800></td>
</tr>
</table>You are in a huge grassy field. There is trail winding down to a [[playground|Playground]] and another trail curving off towards a [[rocky precipice|Rocky Precipice]]. You can also get back to the [[street|Upper Main Street]] from here.
Off in the field are a couple of kids.
<<if hasVisited("On Lap")>>
<<if $visitedFieldOnce and hasVisited("MS Dialog 4")>>
[[Ask Micah and Sammy what they found|MS Random]]
<<else>>
<<set $visitedFieldOnce to true>>
The Kids must be Micah and Sammy that Layne spoke of. It looks like they scanning the field with detectors.
[[Hey kids, are you metal detectors?|MS Dialog 1]]
<</if>>
<<else>>
You call out to the kids but they don't seem to hear you.
<</if>>
You are at the end of the street. There is a grassy area near a rocky precipice. As you look out over the cliff you notice a trail that leads to a large field.
[[Go back down the street|Upper Main Street]]
[[Go down the trail to the field|Field]]
<<if hasVisited("MS Dialog 4")>>
[[What's this...|Final Scene]]
<</if>>
Fun thing to do: See how many movies or tv show references you can recognize.
<span class="bigText200">[[Here|Wake Up]]</span> begins the tale of the search for the “One Pizza”.
No! Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!
You certainly don't want that. [[Go away|Upper Main Street]]You are in a huge grassy field. There is trail winding down to a [[playground|Playground]] and another trail curving off towards a [[rocky precipice|Rocky Precipice]]. You can also get back to the [[street|Upper Main Street]] from here.
What did you find?
<<set $num to random(1,4)>>
<<if $num is 1>>
Micah: "Ring pull... '83... Tizer."
<<elseif $num is 2>>
Sammy: "Hot rocks and grots."
<<elseif $num is 3>>
Micah: "Bits and bobs."
<<elseif $num is 4>>
Sammy: "Three shotgun caps and a blakey."
<<else>>
<</if>>
$numSammy: "I wish those woodpickers would stop picking those trees."
Micah: "What you saids?"
[[Are you two metal detectors?|MS Dialog 2]]
[[Just leave. These two are a little off|Field]]Micah and Sammy hold up their metal detectors and say:
"No, these are metal detectors. We are detectorists!"
You stand corrected.
[[Ask the detectorists if they saw anything last night.|MS Dialog 4]]
You are in a huge grassy field. There is trail winding down to a [[playground|Playground]] and another trail curving off towards a [[rocky precipice|Rocky Precipice]]. You can also get back to the [[street|Upper Main Street]] from here.
You question Micah and Sammy and they confirm that they saw someone roughly your size skulking about. That person skulked up towards the rocky precipice. They did not get a good look at the persons face but they did see that the skulker had what could have been a pizza box.
Head to the [[rocky precipice|Rocky Precipice]] and hopefully the answer to this mystery.
You step over and try using the computer. The keyboard is greasy and it doesn't appear to be working. You also notice a [[push button|Tech Support]] labeled "Tech Help".
You push the button and hear a voice: "IT... Have you tried turning it off and on again"?
[[Hmmm, try turning off and on again.|Computer On]]After turning the computer on again the display fires up. On it reads a message meant for someone else.
<span class="computerText" >Meet me at the concert tonight.</span>
Ha, you feel like you are on the right path to find out what happened to the "One Pizza".
[[Step away from the computer|French Bistro]]You’re inside and the music is filling the air.
<<timed 2s t8n>><img src="music_64.png" width=30 height=30><span class="musicText">But you turned me out, baby (You dropped a bomb on me, baby) </span>
<<next>>You look around for a mysterious type.
<<next>><img src="music_64.png" width=30 height=30><span class="musicText">(You dropped a bomb on me)</span>
<<next>>Not seeing anyone suspicious, you decide to approach the stage.
<<next>><img src="music_64.png" width=30 height=30><span class="musicText">Whoa, whoa, whoa-ohh, baby (You dropped a bomb on me, baby) (You dropped a bomb on me)</span>
<<next>>You are standing behind a group of girls dancing next to the stage.
<<next>><img src="music_64.png" width=30 height=30><span class="musicText">I won't forget what you done to me, baby (You dropped a bomb on me, baby) (You dropped a bomb on me)</span>
<<next>>Looking around... nothing. But you dig this song.
<<next>><img src="music_64.png" width=30 height=30><span class="musicText"> (You dropped a bomb on me, baby) (You dropped a bomb on me)</span>
<<next>>Suddenly the lead singer sticks the microphone past the girls and right in your face.
<<next>>You have no choice but to [[sing]]
<</timed>> You bellow out as best you can...
<<timed 2s t8n>><img src="music_64.png" width=30 height=30><span class="musicText">I, I-I, I-I-I won't forget it</span>
<<next>><img src="music_64.png" width=30 height=30><span class="musicText">I, I-I, I-I-I won't forget it</span>
<<next>>Wow, you sang with the Gap Band and in your own mind you sounded great!
<<next>>After the show comes to a close, you notice an open pack of parmesan and a dirty napkin on the ground.
Amongst the stains on the napkin, there is something written... 13 Coins.
I bet the culprit is at the 13 coins. [[Let’s go!|Lower Main Street]]
<</timed>> You sit down and start a conversation with the guy. You talk about the mission you are on, relationships, and some other things.
After a pleasant talk, you decide you must get back to tracking the “One Pizza”. As you are leaving the guy says, “there are a couple of strange kids in the field a few blocks up. They seem to be there all the time. Maybe they saw something that might help you out”.
“Thanks, uh uh... “
“Layne, Layne Staley”
“Yes, thanks Layne”
[[Hit the streets|Lower Main Street]]On the way out you grab one of the many [[fortune cookies|Fortune]] sitting in a bowl by the door. You head over and start to sit down on the guy’s lap.
He says: “No no no, wait”
He slides closer to his girlfriend and make a spot for you to [[sit|On Lap]].You crack open the cookie and read the fortune.
Kids in fields often possess great wisdom.
Hmm, sound insightful.
[[Hit the streets|Lower Main Street]][[Hi Lucy, Ramona. Where's Sam tonight?|Sam Dialog]]
[[Hey! Did you see anyone suspicious last night?|Suspicious Dialog]] We haven't seen Sam for a few days. He was supposed to meet us here last night but he didn’t show up. Unlike him really. He is usually dependable.
[[Hmm, did you notice anything else strange last night?|Suspicious Dialog]] Lucy says, "As a matter of fact we saw a shady character heading up the street towards the French Bistro.
Ramona says, "We didn't get a good look at him because he had a hat pulled down and it was covering his face.
You thank the girls for the info while you [[scan the streets|Lower Main Street]] for more clues. You anxiously scamper up the trail towards the rocky precipice. You have a strong feeling that the answers you are looking for will soon be found.
You’re not sure what you were expecting to find but looking around reveals nothing. You set you pizza pan shield, that hasn’t been mentioned or used since the start of the game, next to a rock and sit down to think about what to do.
You glance at the pan and see your [[reflection.|Final Final]]Suddenly... images start flashing through your mind.: the heartburn, the hat, the greasy keyboard, the French Bistro guy.
The truth come rushing to your brain and the horror of what you have done pounds your head.
NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
<span class="bigText">[[The End]]</span>The one pizza to rule them all - Lord of the Rings.
French Bistro guy: Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
McGinty: The Jerk.
Lucy and Ramona: Michael Nesmith - Cruisin'.
I will call him George - Looney Tunes.
"What you saids" and "woodpickers" - my kids, when they were young.
We are detectorists - The Detectorists
Have you tried turning it off and on again. - IT Crowd
Singing with the Gap Band - happend to me.
Layne Staley - happend to me.